Faith Can Move Mountains... But Dynamite Works Better

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Heaven And Hell: Sitting Down With A Cast Of Characters, Part One

I thought I'd try the idea of interviewing characters from the book as a creative outlet of sorts, so here we go. Tom Stryker, Meredith Devon, Claire Tavington, Sabra Cohen, Sayid Nahas, Cain Reilly, Jacob Dayan, Zaira Fayed, Rafi Beigel, Dahlia Sarkis, and Eden Adler will be dropping by during the course of this little exercise. Some of them are familiar, if you've been reading bits and pieces here and there. Some of them are new to you. And knowing me, it might get a little silly. Just saying.

Me: Well, hello, and thanks for breaking through the Fourth Wall to talk with me today.

Stryker: You're welcome.

Devon:  Not a problem.

Claire: Just make this quick. The PM is expecting a visit. Full briefing on the Touqan assassination and our progress on the investigation. Top secret and all that. Maybe I shouldn't have just said that around civilians.

Dayan: Oh, I'm sure that won't come back to haunt you.

Eden: And we have plot details to involve ourselves in.

Nahas: And I have to get to a Knesset meeting.

Cain: What's a Fourth Wall?

Me: It's a bit complicated.

Eden: I hope this won't take long. I have a lot of things to do.

Zaira: All of us do, Eden, but let's indulge our writer for a little while.

Me: Very kind of you to say. Why don't we start by talking about how you all feel about being characters in a... do those two always make out like that?

Dayan: Rafi, Dahlia, would you mind not groping each other for a little while?

Beigel: Oh, sorry, we just got all wrapped up in each other.

Dahlia: Can you blame us? He is irresistable, you know.

Beigel: So are you, honey. Really, you're beyond sexy.

Me: Okay, so let's ask the question. How do you feel about being characters in a thriller?

Stryker: It's about time you got to writing me. How long have I been percolating in that head of yours anyway?

Me: A long time, but that's beside the point.

Devon: Not as long for me. Rumor has it he decided on me a couple of years back. And while we're at it, why did you decide to name me Meredith?
Claire: She doesn't like her first name, you know.

Nahas: Meredith is a lovely name, if you ask me.

Sabra: I'm inclined to agree with you on that.

Me: Look, Meredith...

Devon: It's Devon.

Me: Devon. Right. Meredith is a perfectly lovely name, like Sabra and Sayid said. I like it. And sure, I went and changed your name early on in the writing process. I mean, Helen's a great name, but it doesn't seem to suit you.

Devon: Good. I knew a Helen years ago. We had a bad falling out. Regardless, I still don't like being called Meredith. And just so you remember, I have full training in armed and unarmed combat from MI6, so if you use my name to excess, I'll come after you.

Me: Great. I'm being threatened by my characters. At any rate, I'm calling you Devon most of the time.

Dayan: You changed her name?

Zaira: He did the same for you, dear.

Eden: According to my information, he found out that the name Jacob Cohen was Rodney Dangerfield's actual name. He didn't like the idea of using it for you. It would have distracted him.

Sabra: Wait. So my surname came to me by default?

Me: Well, I like the name Cohen. I did think of using Eden for your first name, if you must know, but somehow Sabra seemed much more appropriate for a Mossad agent.

Eden: So I might not have been named Eden? That's getting a little weird.

Cain: I'm not sure why you invited me here. I'm only in a couple of scenes that you already wrote, and you said I'd have a big part down the line.

Me: I asked you because you've got an interesting name, and yes, you're going to be the antagonist in book three. By the way, I've adjusted your backstory a little bit. It helps with your motivation. And while we're.... oh, come on! Rafi! Dahlia! Can you stop with the making out all the time and pay attention?

Dahlia: Sorry. Won't happen again. I promise.

To Be Continued....

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