7:15 AM. Sun's up outside. The human is awake upstairs, from the sound of it.
7:30 AM. Good morning, human! And how are you on this fine day?
7:40 AM. The human pours me a big bowl of yummy kibbles. Oh boy!
7:41 AM. I have wolfed down the entire bowl. Not quite in record time, but close...
7:45 AM. The human's having breakfast. I'm looking outside. Wondering if that annoying squirrel is anywhere in sight. No sign of him from here...
He's probably plotting something evil. Or burying acorns. Squirrels do that.
8:00 AM. The human lets me out the door. Bye, human! I'll see you later!
8:10 AM. Sprinting through the back fields, in search of anything odd. Barking my head off. As usual.
I wonder if my barking so much warns anything off well before I reach them.
8:55 AM. Have met up with Spike The Magnificent, Tormentor of Squirrels. He's out for his morning stroll too. Hello, Spike. Any sign of squirrels today?
9:05 AM. Spike and I are conferring on the location of a good mud puddle when I happen to spot that cranky cat from down the road. I wonder if I can get her to be friends for once...
9:06 AM. Spike cautions me to not rush up to the cat. He reminds me that cats are, after all, ornery creatures who tend to dislike dogs by default. They do not respond well to having their hindquarters sniffed by a dog. Well, Spike, that I knew by experience.
9:08 AM. Spike steps out in advance of me and does the strangest thing, bowing to the cat. He informs the cat that I am a younger dog and not as well versed in the way of cats as I should be, and apologizes for any untoward behaviour of mine in the past.
9:10 AM. The cat walks off. Cats are strange.
Spike agrees that cats are strange, but adds that strange isn't all that bad a thing.
I remark that he lives with four cats, and therefore is outnumbered each and every day. He admits that is the case.
10:35 AM. On my way home. Coming across a big mud puddle.
Oh, I can't resist....
10:40 AM. Mud, mud, mud!
10:30 AM. Coming home. Covered in mud. Looking filthy. Feeling happy.
10:35 AM. The human is less than impressed by how muddy I am. Informs me that it's time for a bath.
Wait a minute, no one said anything about a bath!
10:45 AM. Being subjected to the atrocities of a bath. That water is cold, human! Even for summer!
10:50 AM. The human has finished scrubbing me down with the Towel of Torment.
I'll just have to spend more time in a mud puddle....
12:30 PM. The human is having lunch. I use my sad eyes expression to get a ham and cheese sandwich out of her.
Yum yum yum!
5:25 PM. Awake from a nap. Feel like heading outside. Maybe I can find that mud puddle again...
5:40 PM. The human saw right through my attempts to get out to the mud puddle by taking me for a walk on a leash, of all things.
I hope that cat doesn't see me like this....
6:35 PM. The human is making French toast. One of my very favourites too...
6:55 PM. The human gives me a few slices of French toast on a plate. Though she doesn't add maple syrup to it for some reason. You know, human, I'm not that sloppy an eater...
And don't bring up the spaghetti incident.
7:00 PM. Lying in the living room quite content after a meal of French toast. Yum yum yum...
9:55 PM. The human is watching a baseball game. I'm afraid I don't get the point to running around that diamond thing.
Is it for the same reason that dogs chase their tails?
And why is that fan holding up a sign reading Bartman Must Die? Who's Bartman?
11:05 PM. Game's over. The Cubs have lost by a score of twenty to one. The human says that happens a lot.
The human bids me good night and heads upstairs.
Bye, human. I'll stay down here awhile and try to figure out why Cubs fans would want Bartman dead.