Faith Can Move Mountains... But Dynamite Works Better
Showing posts with label animals. Show all posts
Showing posts with label animals. Show all posts

Saturday, October 24, 2026

A Day In The Life Of A Cat

 And now it is time for the perspective of the cat, who must always have the last word in on these things, what with being a supreme being and all.


7:00 AM. Waking up. Taking a big stretch. Slept well. Dreamed of vast fields of catnip.


7:03 AM. A look outside from the back of the couch. Still not dawn. Light enough to see that there's frost on the ground. Getting to be that time of year again.


7:09 AM. Just where is the staff? I've been up nearly ten minutes now and no sign of her.


7:16 AM. If she's not down here in five minutes, I'm sending a search party after her.


7:20 AM. The staff finally comes downstairs. It's about time, staff. I was this close to making arrangements with search and rescue- ie, me- to come fetch you.


7:22 AM. Making my wishes clear as the staff sets to work in the kitchen. Staff, I want it very clear that I am to see no field rations. Are we clear on that, staff? None.


7:24 AM. The staff puts my breakfast down on the floor. The bowl of milk and plate of chicken are much to my approval. The bowl of field rations is not.


7:26 AM. Finished with the milk and chicken. I have completely ignored the field rations.

I shall leave the staff to have her breakfast in peace and quiet.


7:35 AM. Somewhere in the distance I hear the barking of that foul mutt.


7:48 AM. The staff is leaving for the day. Farewell, staff. Don't forget to pick up milk.


7:51 AM. Watching the staff leave the driveway. Well, what do we have on the schedule for today?


8:01 AM.  Watching the Weather Channel. More frosty nights to come. 


8:21 AM. I think it's time for a well earned nap.


11:34 AM. Waking up from my nap. Big stretch.


11:36. Have come into the kitchen to the disappointment of realizing all that's out in the open is field rations.

Oh well...


12:39 PM. Zoomies.


2:19 PM. Waking up from another nap. Zoomies do get the better of you.


4:36 PM. The staff comes in the front door. It's about time, staff. You did remember the milk?


4:40 PM. The staff is putting groceries away.

Good. There's the milk.


5:19 PM. The staff is making dinner. I smell meat.


6:27 PM. Dinner with the staff. She has cut up some steak for me. She insists on having hers with vegetables. To each their own.


8:40 PM. Pondering the great mystery of the universe is a big ball of string theory.


11:28 PM. The staff is off to bed. Good nights, staff.

By the way, I have oonies scheduled at two.

Saturday, October 17, 2026

A Day In The Life Of A Dog

 It is time, once again, for the perspective of the dog and the cat. As always, we begin with the dog, who gets so easily distracted by literally everything.


7:01 AM. Waking up at home. Big stretch. Still kind of dark out there. And we're getting into that time of year where it's going to be dark for awhile yet. Short days, short days...


7:08 AM. Waiting on the human to get downstairs and see to my breakfast.

I'm a very patient dog.

Now where is she?


7:22 AM. The human comes downstairs. I thump my tail against the floor. Good morning, human!


7:23 AM. Following the human into the kitchen. Oh, good, she knows I've been expecting breakfast...


7:25 AM. The human is pouring me a big bowl of kibbles.

Oh boy oh boy oh boy...


7:26 AM. Licking my chops after finishing off breakfast with just five seconds off my fastest ever consumption of breakfast.

That was good!


7:29 AM. Making inquiries with the human as to if she'll let me outside for my run.


7:31 AM. Out the door and on my way. See you later, human!


7:36 AM. Running through the back fields, barking my head off, as happy as I can be.

Looks like there's been frost in the night.


7:48 AM. Stopping by to see Spike the Magnificent, Tormentor of Squirrels. Hey, Spike!


7:49 AM. After customary doggie greetings, Spike and I set to discussing matters of great importance. Like what the squirrels are up to. They're stashing away a whole lot of nuts, Spike. For what reason? Do squirrels possess catapults?


7:53 AM. Spike and I discuss the impending holiday. Halloween.  

My human keeps me behind closed doors so I don't bark at trick or treaters.


8:01 AM.  Parting ways with Spike to head home.


8:17 AM. Jumping through a stream in the woods. Nice and cold.


8:33 AM. Returning home. Barking to let the human know I have returned.


8:34 AM. The human intercepts me with the Towel of Torment rather than let me dry off natural by the fireplace.


10:35 AM. Mooching a cookie from the human.


12:09 PM. I have convinced the human to give me a ham and cheese sandwich while she has lunch.


1:30 PM. Barking at the mailman as he drops off some mail. Get lost!


2:48 PM. The human is having afternoon tea. I am persuading her to give me a scone.


6:36 PM. The human is having dinner. Spaghetti and meatballs for her. Just meatballs for me. She clearly remembers the Incident.

Oh well, meatballs are good.


8:45 PM.  Pondering life's mysteries. Is the universe one big tennis ball?


11:47 PM. The human is off the bed. Good night, human. Keep the door open. I'll patrol in the night. In between naps.

Saturday, October 10, 2026