The Old Tesla Stocks Scam Again

Just when you think you've seen it all. The scammers and the spammers have nothing else to do with their day but send their random comments and emails to hundreds or thousands of destinations, all hoping to draw some attention or, better yet, draw in a sucker dumb enough to believe them. They are a wretched lot, that group known to science as homo sapiens spammeritis irritatingus. They are incapable of finding an honest way to make a living. And so this is what they do. 

The following came through to my email recently.

Hello, This email is from Elon Musk and the Founder, CEO and Chief Engineer of the SpaceX team; Early-stage investor, CEO and product architect of Tesla, Inc.; founder of The Boring Company; and co-founder of Neuralink and OpenAI. With an estimated net worth of around $245 billion. Your email address was randomly selected from the US and Canada email databases and you won 18,087.71 shares of Tesla at $228.0 per share (TSLA) worth 4 $124,270.00. Please take this email seriously by responding to this email or contacting (claims@teslasfdn.com) to make a claim.

I'm sorry- did you say please take this email seriously? Rest assured, I would not even think of taking it seriously. Because it's got scam written all over it. It's claiming that I'm a winner of a random selection for over eighteen thousand shares of Tesla stock, at 228 dollars a share. They add in the final amount it's supposed to be worth (though they put the $ in the wrong spot. Because just randomly giving away four million dollars in stock is the sort of thing that's done.

And even if I were to believe this nonsense (I don't), why would I want stock in that company? Owned by a guy who's one of the biggest assholes on the planet? No thank you, I'd rather hold onto my integrity. 

Nice try, ace, but there are no stocks, because this isn't legitimate. You're lying through your teeth, like you always do, about everything. 

Sigh. I'd like to take you somewhere with a grand view. Somewhere high.

And push you off it.

Love And Bombs On The High Sea

Egomaniacal Director Plots Adaptation Of Inane Television Show, Basks In Himself

Los Angeles (AP) It is a truth, universally acknowledged, that an egomaniac in want of attention will call a press conference. At least that's how Jane Austen might write her introduction these days. A fitting way for this reporter to introduce a story of an egomaniac at work promoting himself. After the recent unpleasantness of his former editor being committed to an insane asylum after years of deranged behaviour and threats, this reporter was pleased to get a new editor who's entirely pleasant. Even to the point of giving this reporter a twist on a regular assignment: full permission to ridicule the subject as needed. Thanks to the new editor (editor: you're welcome)

And so it was recently that this reporter arrived at the LA headquarters of Digital Domain, home base of the biggest ego in Hollywood- which is saying something. Michael Bay, the explosion prone director of such mindless dreck as Pearl Harbor, the Transformers franchise, and much more, has had in recent years a growing backlog of projects he keeps meaning to get to. Such is the case with his newest project.

This reporter joined a handful of actual reporters- all still masked- and a horde of entertainment reporters- all unmasked- in the auditorium at the studio. A podium had been set up on stage. Along with a mirror. The entertainment reporters were gushing about what was to be announced. This reporter wondered if he could call in a favour from a cranky Mountie. 

At length, a woman strode out on the stage and called for attention. "Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for the greatest director of our time and any other time.... Michael Bay!" The entertainment reporters broke out into applause. Real reporters began rolling their eyes (editor: for good reason; Michael Bay is a wanker). Has this reporter mentioned how grateful he is for the new editor?

Bay came out on stage, waving and grinning like an idiot, looking his usual self. Dishevelled hair, stubble, casual clothing. He walked up to the podium, winked at his reflection in the mirror, and began to speak to the crowd. "Thank you! Thanks for coming out! It's wonderful to see you all here today. You know, it's been awhile since we've had one of these." Not long enough, this reporter thought to himself. "But here we are, getting our way through this whole pandemic thing. Sorry for the no room for social distancing thing, but hey... people love seeing me. So I'm sure it'll all be fine. Anyway, where was I? Oh, yes. The big announcement."

He paused a moment before continuing. "You know, I think a lot about the masterpieces I've made and the things I still have to do. I've given the world my spin on World War Two and asteroids and giant robots and all that. Now I want to move in a new direction. Something that you might not expect out of me."

He smiled as he looked out at the audience, totally oblivious to the contempt on the faces of real reporters. "I thought about a television series. Not doing a television series, but adapting one. Bringing it to the big screen for a three hour extravaganza of fun, Aerosmith tunes, bikini clad women, and explosions. Because you've got to have explosions. What kind of movie is it when there aren't explosions?"

He paused once more before continuing. "And so it is, ladies and gentlemen, that I will be adapting for the big screen... The Love Boat."

Entertainment reporters broke out into applause. Real reporters rolled their eyes and sighed. Bay remained utterly oblivious to their disdain, laughing and basking in the esteem of the entertainment reporters. The television series had followed a number of crew members on a cruise ship helping various guest stars each week with their romantic foibles, back in the 1970s and 1980s. It was a light hearted but utterly tedious show with faded stars in the guest roles each week, following a tired formula (editor: I agree with you; who was calling for a reboot of that dreck?)

And so this reporter sighed, expecting the worst. Because even more obnoxious than a retread of a 70s television show is a hack of a director like Michael Bay directing it. Of course he would announce his usual crew of nitwits as the main characters, but what washed up contemporary actors would fill out the list of passengers on this cruise ship to movie going hell? And how many Michael Bay techniques would we be seeing? Because he had already mentioned explosions.

"Thank you! Thank you! Oh, what a wonderful response!" Bay said, pleased by the cheers of the entertainment reporters. 

"Are you insane?" this reporter inquired. (editor: spoiler note- he is).

"Why does everyone keep asking that?" Bay asked, oblivious to the contempt from the actual reporters. "Now of course we have to tell the story of passengers finding romance as they meet on this great cruise ship off the West Coast. But there has to be more. Because I'm Michael Bay, the greatest film director ever, and I know what the audience wants. Which is why my plot will shift as the heroic crew tangles with a villain hidden among the passengers. A mad bomber out to make a whole lot of trouble. I mean, I did mention explosions, after all."

"Are you aware the bomber on a ship thing has been done before? It was called Speed 2, and it was a sequel no one was asking for," this reporter pointed out.

"I've never heard of it." Bay shrugged, smiled like an idiot before carrying on. "And we'll have high drama, great action, amazing explosions, and life and death stakes. And explosions. So without further ado, let's start introducing you to our stellar cast. Playing the leading role of Captain Stubing, he's one of my favourite actors and one of yours... Mr. Nicolas Cage!"

Cage came out on stage, carrying a bottle of aged whiskey and lighting a cigar with a hundred dollar bill. Obviously his previous brushes with near bankruptcy have not taught him anything. He looked as bizarre as usual, which is saying something. "Hey there!" he called out to the crowd. "Great to be here. And it'll be great playing this role. Did I mention I always wanted to be an admiral?"

He joined Bay, who gave him a fist bump. "And two of my other favourite actors playing key roles in this film. He'll be playing Doc, and she'll be playing Julie... let's give it up for Shia LaBeouf and Megan Fox!" 

The two stepped out on stage; she was wearing a low cut black dress and gave the entertainment reporters a view of her proverbial assets. He was waving like an idiot, and started talking in the third person like he usually does. "Shia approves of all this applause!" he told the entertainment reporters. "Shia loves to bask in the love! It is good for Shia!" This reporter wondered if Shia LaBeouf understood how much of a dumbass he came across as. 

Fox and Labeouf joined Bay and Cage, and Bay smiled like the dolt that he is. "I've got plenty more casting to come. After all, we've got our villain to cast. I tried calling Jon Voight, my go-to guy on these things, but he's too busy curled up in a fetal position and muttering his undying loyalty to some guy named Trump. So we'll have to find someone else who can emphasize crazy like no one else can. I'd go with Samuel L. Jackson, but he told me to go **** myself. I don't know why... I mean, I'm a perfectly respectable person."

"It just means Sam has standards," this reporter suggested. 

True to form, Bay didn't understand that he was being insulted. "It can't be that."

He smiled again. "At any rate, lots of things for us to do and lots to get ready for. So get yourself ready for an extravaganza of fun on the open seas with five star service, sunbathing, and explosions. It's The Love Boat, Michael Bay style, and it's coming to your theatres before you know it. As soon as I've got all the other stuff I'm working on done. Genius takes time, you know..."

"You're not a genius," this reporter called out.

Bay laughed. "You kidder!" With that, Bay and his cast left the stage. Entertainment reporters were gushing. Real reporters shook their heads and took their leave. In an ideal world, Michael Bay would be thrown off a cruise ship. In the middle of the Bermuda Triangle (editor: covered in barbecue sauce and tossed in with hungry sharks).

This reporter likes his new editor.

Descending Into The Madness

“Gotham’s lost its way. What kind of coward would do something that cold blooded? Someone who hides behind a mask.” ~ Thomas Wayne

“I’m waiting for the punchline.” ~ Murray Franklin

“For my whole life, I didn’t know if I really existed. But I do, and people are starting to notice.” ~ Arthur Fleck

A very different sort of comic book adaptation for the cinema is out there now. Joker is a standalone deeply psychological character study of a descent into madness. Or a descent deeper into madness. In a Gotham City without a Batman, the film tells the story of a mentally ill nobody who becomes somebody… by giving himself completely over to his own madness. In a tour de force performance by Joaquim Phoenix, we see the character in a different light. Not a sympathetic one, but a compelling one, thanks to the actor.

Set in Gotham City in 1981, the film tells the story of Arthur Fleck (Phoenix), who lives with his mother Penny (Frances Conroy). Gotham is a city filled with crime, unemployment, decay, and despair. Thomas Wayne (Brett Cullen) is running for mayor, not as sympathetic as previous portrayals, as he’s dismissive of the problems those in poverty face. Arthur is mentally ill, given to laughter at the wrong times, getting help from a social worker, but mired in mediocrity as a party clown. There’s a hint of possibility with a neighbor, Sophie (Zazee Beetz), but events turn against Arthur, with violence and a deepening madness accelerating out of control.

The film takes part of its inspiration from back story in an acclaimed Batman tale, The Killing Joke, with the motif of a failed standup comedian in the background of the Joker. Director Todd Phillips co-wrote the story and screenplay with Scott Silver, and their story is a tightly wound character study that’s set in a Gotham familiar to us- the relentless growing darkness and misery, the tensions in the community, the rising crime. It’s a surprise given the background of Phillips, whose work has mostly been in comedy like The Hangover trilogy. Because the story is dark and gets under your skin in a way that you wouldn’t expect out of his CV. Silver is a bit of a different story, having had directed or written films that are character studies, such as The Fighter or The Finest Hours.

The challenge of the film is in telling a story in which there’s not really someone to be sympathetic about, which the screenplay succeeds in doing. Arthur Fleck is not sympathetic, even if he’s clearly suffering from mental illness. A given decision here, a bad moment there, leads him off into a deeper version of that illness; one wonders if it might have been preventable in other circumstances. But the character’s not sympathetic. Nor for that matter is Robert De Niro as Murray Franklin, a talk show host who’s more concerned with himself than anything else. The take on Thomas Wayne, less philanthropic than we might be used to given previous versions in cinema and comics, isn’t sympathetic. There’s a ruthless, callous disregard for others as the story unfolds. We might feel some measure of sympathy for Sophie, and for the young Bruce Wayne, though we know what the boy will become years down the road.

The story concerns itself with mental illness, the pitfalls of fame, class struggles, the misery of poverty, and the madness of a mob mentality. It weaves these themes throughout in a way that is quite different from your standard comic book movie, focusing deeply on character instead of spectacle. That reflects in the directing style. Phillips does stage action in the film, and does so well, but the film doesn’t need to rely on special effects and doesn’t. Instead it seems to take a lot of its influence from late-70s dark character studies (the inclusion of Robert De Niro speaks to that, as you can see a lot of parallels to his film Taxi Driver with its protagonist descending into madness, as well as his The King Of Comedy, which mines some of the same material). Phillips handles the tone in the right way, giving us a film that makes us feel like silent witnesses into madness. It’s brutally effective.

Zazie Beetz made an impression as Domino in Deadpool 2. Here she’s in another comic book adaptation, but one as an original character. She has to play Sophie in more than one way, thanks to how the story unfolds, responding to Arthur in different ways as the story goes along. She’s someone to be sympathetic about, generally likable, and initially there’s an easy chemistry between her character and Arthur that winds up going in a completely different direction.

Frances Conroy plays Arthur’s mother Penny. It’s a difficult role; the character is both physically and mentally ill, so Arthur gets his madness from somewhere. She’s delusional, harsh in her own way, and not sympathetic, but the actress makes the most of that madness, giving a compelling performance. We’re left to wonder for ourselves how much of her delusions might be just that, and how much of it might be a glimpse of the truth.

Brett Cullen is one of those character actors you’ve seen on numerous occasions in film and television. He’s actually appeared in the world of the Dark Knight before, playing a congressman in The Dark Knight Rises. Here his take on Thomas Wayne is a formidable one, and less sympathetic than we’re used to from the character. He’s a billionaire who has no regard for the disenfranchised, a man seeking power for himself as a mayor, but with no concern for the citizens who don’t have much of a voice. There’s a callous disregard the character has for those outside his orbit, and a protectiveness of his own legacy. It might not be a sympathetic take, but Cullen’s Thomas Wayne is one you remember.

Robert De Niro has spent the last few years in what we could call a hit and miss trajectory in his career. One film might be a compelling one, but another will be a disaster- mostly comedies, which it’s obvious he’s only doing for the paycheck. Here he gets a good part, and he reminds us just how good an actor he is. Murray is unsympathetic, a talk show host more concerned with his own reputation and celebrity and not really paying much regard to the consequences of his actions. He mocks a video performance of a disastrous standup routine by Arthur, never thinking it might come back to haunt him. It’s a fascinating job by the actor, evoking other films from his past.

One could say Joaquin Phoenix was suited for this role, given that he’s had the odd occasion in the past where he seemed, well… not entirely there. Phoenix did not want to take roles in the Marvel cinematic universe, because that would require multiple appearances in sequels. But he had been interested in a character study about a villain. This take on the Joker does stand on its own- this is not the Jared Leto Joker we’ve seen in Suicide Squad, or the one from the Nolan trilogy. In fact, it’s left ambiguous as to if he’s even the Joker at all, or inspiration for someone who’ll become the Joker. His performance is a marvel: a descent into utter madness by a man already halfway there, a mediocrity in life who finds his purpose in a life of violence and mayhem. The character isn’t sympathetic, but Phoenix makes him utterly compelling to watch throughout the film as he brings out the chaos and malevolence of a mind gone terribly wrong.

Joker turns out to be a dark, relentless film that gives us a protagonist we can’t root for but can’t look away from. In its depiction of the downfall of a man and the downfall of a city, it turns out to be an unsettling film that gets under your skin, leaves you unnerved, and leaves you hoping for a Dark Knight.

A Day In The Life Of A Mobster

I have something different today, the point of view of a gangster. I still haven't decided if he's a snitch.

7:25 AM. Awake at home. Having breakfast. Hot coffee and toast. Well done, just the way I like it. The wife’s off in the Caribbean somewhere. Gotta look up where, sooner or later. Theresa said something about tans and beaches and margaritas, I don’t know, I wasn’t paying much attention….

7:53 AM. A last look at myself in the mirror before I head out the door. Crisp grey suit, matching tie, black shirt. Jeez, I’m starting to look like a stereotype of the job.

7:55 AM. Stepping out my front door. Nico and Lorenzo are waiting by the Rolls. Hey, fellas, how the **** you doing? You do know I can drive myself, right?

7:56 AM. Nico tells me Don Bianchi wants to see me right away. The boss himself? Wow, I wonder what brought him all the way here from Sicily. Okay, fellas, so let’s get moving already.

8:20 AM. Nico and Lorenzo walk me into the coffee warehouse. That’s what we call the place anyway. Bianchi Coffee. Not that we actually move coffee, and the cops know it. Knowing it and proving it are two different things, you know what I’m saying?

8:21 AM. Finding myself in the back office, where Don Carlos Bianchi is waiting in person. The capo di capi of the whole organization. Don Bianchi, it’s an honour.

Something seems off. The don doesn’t seem pleased to see me.

8:23 AM. Nico and Lorenzo have put me down on a chair. Hard. And they’re looming behind me like the three hundred pounds of hired muscle that they are. Don Bianchi accuses me of ratting to the cops. I’m horrified by the accusation. I mean, come on, Don Bianchi, what kind of low down rat would talk to the cops? I mean, sure, they call me Joey the Rat, but that’s an ironic name! I have no idea who squealed to the cops and got your grandson thrown in jail for the next thirty years, but if I knew, I’d have already whacked them, bada bing bada boom! You of all people know how safe a secret is when it’s kept by me. I mean, I’ve never told anyone that Nico is banging Lorenzo’s wife and Lorenzo doesn’t even…

Oh, ****, did I just say that out loud?

8:25 AM. Don Bianchi tells Nico and Lorenzo to stop hitting each other. They stop, and then he makes a hand gesture. Before I know what’s happening, I feel an impact to the back of my head, and everything goes black.

11:14 AM. Coming to. Feels like everything is moving. Opening my eyes. Looking around. Assessing. Looks like I’m in a plane cabin. A small plane. Hands tied behind my back. Lying on the floor. Nico is over there. Lorenzo is in the other direction. Both of them aren’t looking at each other. Hey, fellas, a little help here, you know what I'm saying?

11:28 AM. Nico and Lorenzo haven’t said much of anything to me, aside from telling me to shut up. Come on, fellas, so I slipped up about the whole thing with Nico screwin’ Giulietta, so what? These things happen. I mean, it’s not like I haven’t had some action on the side myself while my Theresa isn’t paying attention. Now where were we? Oh, right, how about you untie me and we let bygones be bygones?

12:03 PM. The pilot calls back to Nico and Lorenzo. Says we’re out past the limit and depressurized. The limit of what? Come on, fellas, you know me. You know I would never have ratted to the cops. I mean, there’s that whole code we have. The omerta. Code of silence. We’re mobsters. We don’t rat each other out. At least to the cops. Sorry about the whole ratting you and Giulietta out thing, Nico, but it was an honest mistake. My point is there’s a big difference between slipping up and letting Lorenzo know his wife has been cheating on him, and giving the cops evidence to put away Paolo Bianchi for drug trafficking!

12:05 PM. Nico and Lorenzo help me up to my feet. It’s about time, fellas, so go ahead and untie me already, my wrists are sore.

12:06 PM. Lorenzo moves forward, while Nico’s hustling me by the arm from behind. I stop when I see Lorenzo opening up the cabin door. I hear the roar of the air outside coming. It suddenly hits me that this is a one way trip for me. Now wait a minute, fellas… let’s not lose our heads here.

12:07 PM. Nico starts pushing me towards the open door. Come on! Look, we can make a deal, right? I’ve got money. Us three, fellas, and hell, even the pilot. We can make a ****ing deal. Hey! Lorenzo, I toasted you and Giulietta at your wedding, remember? You honestly telling me you’re gonna whack one of your wedding guests?

12:07:32 PM. Nico and Lorenzo push and pull me closer to the door. One last glance outside at the big void of empty air. Looks like we’re five thousand feet up. Lots of ocean down there. Oh, ****, come on fellas, couldn’t you have just put two bullets in my head bada bing bada boom? That would have been merciful!

12:08:17 PM. They’ve got me right at the threshold. I can feel the wind against my face. Hands tied up behind me, can’t grip anything… Nico yells in my ear that I should know that Theresa is ****ing that trainer at her gym. Wait a minute… my Theresa is banging Randy ****ing Walden???

12:08:29 PM. Two pairs of hands shove me out the door. I feel myself falling straight off, hurtling down towards the ocean. Wondering if I’ll lose consciousness before I hit. Wondering how bad the impact will be. Wondering how the **** I could have missed the fact that my wife is ****ing her trainer. Wondering if she’s banging him right now wherever the **** she is. I mean, that ****ing idiot Walden??? What’s he got that I do….

12:10 PM. A moment of blackness. Opening my eyes. Finding myself in a fire and brimstone kinda place with guys with red skin, carrying pitchforks and bullwhips. I think this is hell, you know what I’m saying?

**** that! Joey the Rat Falcone was supposed to end up in the other place! 

So You Want To Conquer Death?

With Hallowe'en coming, I thought I would review three films appropriate for this time of year. This is the first.

“I do know that for the sympathy of one living being, I would make peace with all. I have love in me the likes of which you can scarcely imagine and rage the likes of which you would not believe. If I cannot satisfy the one, I will indulge the other.” ~ The Creature

“There was something at work in my soul which I do not understand.” ~ Victor Frankenstein

“Lives come and go. If we succeed, our names will live on forever. I will be hailed as the benefactor of our species.” ~ Captain Walton

"I'm here to become a mere doctor. I'm told that has something to do with healing the sick, which is a pity, really, because I find sick people rather revolting." ~ Henry Clerval

“I’m frightened that if I tell you the truth, I’ll lose you.” ~ Victor Frankenstein 

“You’ll lose me if you don’t.” ~ Elizabeth

In 1994, Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein came to theatres, as something of a companion film to the earlier Bram Stoker’s Dracula. The first film had been directed by Francis Ford Coppolla with a screenplay by James V. Hart, and both men were producers for this adaptation of Shelley’s classic horror novel. Directed by Kenneth Branagh, who starred as the overly ambitious scientist trying to conquer death by creating life, the film is overwrought and operatic at times, but also faithful to the source material, presenting a different take on the monster and the man who created him.

The film travels back and forth in time, much of it as an extended flashback, a story told in 1794 by a depleted Victor Frankenstein (Branagh) to Robert Walden (Aidan Quinn), a ship’s captain in the Arctic obsessed with reaching the North Pole. He reveals his tumultuous history, growing up as the son of the Baron Frankenstein (Ian Holm) and his wife Caroline (Cherie Lunghi), along with the young girl they took in when he was a child, Elizabeth, who grew to be the woman he loved (Helena Bonham Carter). The death of his mother in childbirth becomes the great shattering blow for the young Frankenstein. He vows that no one ever need die.

At medical school, Victor makes friends with a classmate, Henry Clerval (Tom Hulce), challenges his professors, including Professor Waldman (John Cleese), who harbours his own murky secrets about experiments in life and death. Victor begins to conduct his own experiments, heedless of the consequences, determined to cheat death by creating life. Assembling his creation by stitching together body parts, he brings it to life, but finds it to be a failure, renouncing the course of action he took. His creation (Robert De Niro), however, has other ideas.

The screenplay by Frank Darabont and Steph Lady closely adapts the novel (though Darabont himself has stated his own issues with the finished product). It weaves together themes like madness, selfishness, obsession, ambition, the meaning of existence, and the consequences of actions- or disregard for consequences- all of which run deeply through Shelley’s narrative, which is one of the reasons it resonates so deeply as a classic. Including the framing device of Captain Walton’s presence as a bookend for the beginning and ending of the film was something that hadn’t been done before- the character appears in the book, but not the various movies. It gives a different structure to the film and different nuances than earlier versions.

The story also presents the creature in a different way. He’s been presented in films as a sad wretch or a killing machine (and truthfully those can be seen here), but the script gives the creature depth, showing him as a new life trying to understand his place in the world, and driven to destruction because he’s been rejected by the world. As time goes on, the creature shows himself to be a mixture of intelligence and puzzlement, scarred by a horrible appearance and capable of profound thought. His relationship with his creator is a contrast- Victor fears what he created but also is capable of pity for him, while the creature both hates the man who rejected him but also views him as a father.

Branagh’s directing and cinematographic style throughout the film tends to be grand, dramatic, over the top, and frantic at times, perhaps best expressed in the creation sequence, with rapid edits, swooping camera shots, and Gothic set pieces. The film has an operatic quality, perhaps to the point where we wonder if the film itself has become something of a monster of the director’s creation. And yet the film is also rooted deeply in horror, as it should be. Branagh effectively brings to life an eighteenth century setting in terms of the locations chosen for filming- the Frankenstein manor feels like quite a grand place. The same applies to the costuming and props the crew contribute to the film, giving an authenticity to the film. Even the machinery Frankenstein uses feels plausible for the era.

And the look of the creature, essential to the story, is well rendered through make up and prosthetics- De Niro looks stitched together and scarred, limping along, as his legs are uneven; he does look like a nightmare. The film got an Oscar nomination for its makeup effects, and that’s well deserved. The score by Branagh’s frequent collaborator Patrick Doyle matches the mood of the film: occasionally intimate, but often Gothic, brooding, and operatic, rising to the point of nightmarish at times.

The cast is well chosen. Ian Holm, who had worked with Branagh before, is well cast as Baron Frankenstein, a wise and kind man, the patriarch of his family. Cherie Lunghi plays his wife- at least until her death early on in the story, and they make a believable, grounded couple; the viewer might wonder what Victor might have turned out to be like had his mother lived. Would Victor have ended up following his dark obsession without heed of the consequences?

John Cleese, who’s known as a comedic actor, instead plays the professor Waldman with gravity and seriousness, no trace of the wink in the eye that you’d expect of the actor. Tom Hulce takes what could be a cliché character and works well with it. Henry is loyal to a fault, an intelligent man who’s something of a bumbler at times. He befriends Victor early on, stays friends with him, and in fact acts as a voice of conscience to him. Even if Victor isn’t heeding Henry’s warnings of the course he’s chosen- Victor listens too often only to his obsessions- that voice is needed, and Hulce brings that across through the film.

Aidan Quinn’s presence at the beginning and ending of the film, providing a framework for the story, restores Shelley’s narrative flow from the book, and his character provides a counter balance to Victor’s obsessions. When we first meet Captain Walton, we see a man driven by ambition to make his place in history, so much so that he’s disregarding the discontent of his crew, all of whom are worried about being trapped in Arctic ice and their prospects of reaching home again. After hearing Victor’s story, and seeing with his own eyes the creature that was the result of his obsession, Walton is able to do what Victor could not- turn back from his ambitions before it’s too late. He’s humbled by what he sees, takes lessons to heart, and treats the creature with sympathy, treating him as a human being, something that the creature has rarely experienced. It’s a good touch for the character, and the actor conveys that personal shift- from obsession to epiphany- in the right way.

Helena Bonham Carter is well cast as Elizabeth. The character is a mix of seriousness, spirit, and enjoying life. There is intelligence, life, and energy in her, in a way that you might not expect out of a woman in the 18^th century (a nod to the author herself). Carter’s performance gives Elizabeth depth and makes her complete in and of herself. That shows itself in how she deals with Victor- the romantic bond is certainly believable, but she is also able to give Victor enough of an ultimatum to pull him back from the edge. And where she ends up by film’s end shows another side of the theme of consequences to actions- her choice demonstrates to Victor that disregarding consequences only ends in destruction.

De Niro has the strongest performance of the cast as the Creature. He first appears as a criminal about to be executed, but spends most of the film as what is supposed to be a monster, and yet turns out to be a mix of terror, pathos, and ultimately humanity. The Creature comes into a world not knowing where he belongs, finds himself driven out by society, and out into the wilderness. Gradually his intelligence asserts itself and he learns how to read and speak, but his fleeting encounters with humanity tend to end badly. The audience can feel for him- and does when we see his pain, both physical and emotional. De Niro conveys that strongly, as well as the sense that the Creature is ashamed of his appearance. When he is finally drawn back to the life of his creator, we see him as something of an intellectual equal to Victor, capable of asking deeply philosophical questions- the question as to if he has a soul certainly is something that resonates deeply. De Niro plays the role as a mix of pity and rage, driven by revenge over his rejection by the world. Ultimately, however, the rage is spent, and his final act is one of compassion and humanity- which makes the character all the more compelling.

Branagh’s take on Victor matches the film itself- Gothic and over the top at times. His best work is opposite De Niro and Carter- especially a conversation Victor and the Creature have amid an ice field in which Victor is trying to make amends. It’s a quiet moment in a film that’s often frantic, and yet it’s one of the best scenes in the film, two master actors in very different positions having a philosophical discussion. The character though is inherently selfish- brilliant but obsessed with his goal to the point of shutting out everything else. At a pivotal moment late in the film, he asks not “are you okay”, but to “say my name”, a telling sign of his selfishness. Victor is so bound in his ambitions and his experiments that he fails to take into account the consequences of his actions- which is one of the things that makes the character and book so compelling. It’s the pursuit of knowledge without taking everything into consideration that continues to make it a classic. Instead Branagh’s Victor learns the lessons far too late of what his obsessions have cost him. It’s only after everything he’s valued has been destroyed and taken from him that Victor understands the penalty of ambition.

Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein does follow the book closely, for the most part, and strongly delves into the themes. Two centuries plus on, the book remains a classic because it asks difficult questions, profound questions that challenge us. In a world with cloned sheep and the acceleration of artificial intelligence, we would be wise to heed its lessons. This film adaptation captures the era well, featuring strong performances in a narrative that does go over the top and completely operatic in its scope at times, but presents the characters with depth and humanity- especially a vengeful Creature who has far more empathy than his creator could have imagined.