Faith Can Move Mountains... But Dynamite Works Better

Saturday, March 28, 2015

A Day In The Life Of A Dog

Some links before getting started today. Yesterday having had been a Friday, Parsnip had a Square Dog Friday. Krisztina had ideas for Easter decoration. Eve had a Facebook unfriended post at her blog. Lorelei had a look at her other book. And Mark shared seven things.

We turn once again to the regular dog and cat point of view posts, starting, as always, from the view of the hound (Loki as he happens to be called, a fitting name for such a canine)....

7:35 AM. Waking up. Dreamed of chasing a rabbit. For some inexplicable reason the rabbit got away. Maybe next time...

7:42 AM. Good morning, human! Nice day, isn’t it? It looks like we got more snow overnight. Tell me, is this winter ever going to end? More pressing business though: how about some breakfast?

7:48 AM. Wolfing down a bowl full of kibbles. Yum yum yum!!!

7:51 AM. Out the back door for my morning constitutional. If I catch up to my arch nemesis the infernal squirrel, so much the better.

8:02 AM. Running through the back fields. Barking my head off. Lots of snow. Aren’t we past the first day of spring yet?

8:26 AM. Stopping in to pay a visit to Spike the Magnificent, Tormentor of Squirrels. We greet in the customary dog style.

8:28 AM. Spike and I confer on movements of the enemy. Squirrels have not been seen by either of us in the last three days, though both of us have heard them in the woods. Devious little bastards. They must be up to something completely evil. And whatever it is, you just know it involves nuts.

8:31 AM. Spike and I discuss the upcoming Easter holiday. It is still a perplexing thing to both of us, but there are many things about humans that perplex dogs. For some reason they won’t let us have chocolate eggs.

8:43 AM. I part ways with Spike after we agree to keep each other updated through the bark line on any squirrel world domination plots. 

9:03 AM. Stopping by that property where that cranky cat lives. And hey, there she is, sniffing at the snow! I think I’ll say hello. Woof!

9:04 AM. The cranky cat hisses at me and expresses deep disdain. Come on, cat, why can’t you and I just let bygones be bygones and be buddies? 

9:05 AM. The cat warns me that if I step so much as one paw on her property, she will go scorched earth on me. What does that mean? Scorched earth? Cats. I’ll never figure them out.

9:06 AM. Taking my leave, continuing on my way through the woods. Bye, cat. Maybe you’ll be in a better mood tomorrow.

9:22 AM. Back home. Barking at the door. Hey, human! I’m home!

9:24 AM. Inside and settling into the living room for a nap. As always, I turn in a circle three times and settle down by the fireplace.

12:05 PM. Waking up from nap. Smell the air. Something is cooking, but it’s too early for dinner...

12:06 PM. Coming into the kitchen. Big pan on the stove. Human nearby. Oh, she’s making soup.

The problem with soup is she won’t give me any. Something about me making a lot of mess. Come on, human, it was only the one time!

12:27 PM. I use my sad eye puppy look to mooch a dinner roll from the human. Yum yum yum!

1:15 PM. The human is off running errands in the barn. I, meanwhile, am busy staring out the window in anticipation of the mailman.

1:22 PM. I spot the mailman’s truck coming down the road. I bark most strenuously in frustration at his insolence in coming down this road! How dare he leave anything in that mailbox!

1:23 PM. There he is! Putting mail in the box! Barking my head off! This is an outrage! You and I will have words! If I had my way, my teeth would be clamped on your leg!

1:31 PM. The human comes in, carrying the mail. Human! The vile mailman once again left mail, despite my barks of outrage!

5:53 PM. Waking up from my latest nap. Smell of bacon in the house. Oh, this is too good to pass up... The human is making bacon pancakes! Human! Have I mentioned how much I love you?

6:23 PM. Having dinner. The human and I are feasting on bacon pancakes. You know, you can really taste the bacon when you chew slowly....

11:31 PM. The human is off to bed. Good night, human! I will stay down here, and try to figure out where you have hidden all those Easter treats you’ve bought.

Of course, with my luck, they’re in the pantry or in some closet, and my lack of opposable thumbs can’t navigate door knobs.


  1. The dog walker ...hehehehehehehe!
    Jane x

  2. Oh, that hacker dog! Love these!

  3. Those Scotties look very familiar!

  4. No cookies this time? The face on that dog with the candles is adorable and the raincoat meme is priceless. Great post!

  5. @Jane and Chris: poor dog walker!

    @Cheryl: thanks!

    @Norma: Scottie overdose today!

    @Eve: thank you!

  6. Love the Mailman picture. My husband was a paperboy as a youngster and he has some stories about the trickiness of dogs.

  7. The double jointed German Shepherd.

  8. I love the butt off the sofa one. ;)

  9. Ack the cuteness it killing me.
    And no no no there can never be a Scotty overdose !

    Of course thehamish will have all the cookies. And that photo looks just like him.
    Watson is a brindled Scotty so he has never been really black black Scotty.

    cheers, parsnip

  10. Once again, got me chuckling. Dog-gone cute. Butt in the air one's a winner, I think!

  11. Oh my goodness.... This was cute as usual. Love the dog with his nose in the curtain.

  12. @Carole: my dad was a postman most of his working life, and he had stories.

    @Mari: isn't it cute?

    @Mari: that appears to be a consensus.

    @Parsnip: I knew you'd like the Scotties.

    @Lorelei: thanks!

    @Shelly: so did I.

  13. Oh've got some laugh-out-loud funnies here! I really like the dog that hacked the vet's computer to neuter the cat!

  14. Loved the pics, so hilarious!


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