Faith Can Move Mountains... But Dynamite Works Better

Monday, October 26, 2015

A Day In The Life Of A Dog

Hallowe'en is soon upon us, so I'm having my dog and cat's point of view on the whole thing. As always, I start off with the resident hound.

7:26 AM. Waking up at home. Had strange dreams of little kid with blanket going on and on about something called a Great Pumpkin. I wonder what that means.

7:34 AM. The human is downstairs. I greet her with a wag of the tail and a happy grin. Hello, human! Did you know I haven't had a bite to eat since last night at ten? 

7:36 AM. Devouring a big bowl of kibbles. Yum yum yum!!!!

7:39 AM. Out the door for my morning run. Bye, human! 

7:56 AM. Running through the backfields, barking madly. Looks like we had a bit of snow overnight. Good! The more the better. 

8:04 AM. Barking at some geese flying overhead. Woof woof woof!!!

8:11 AM. A stop in to see Spike the Magnificent, Tormentor of Squirrels. We greet each other in the customary doggie fashion.

8:13 AM. Spike and I confer on what's going to happen tonight. Children dressed up in all sorts of garish ways are going to be coming to the door, and our humans are going to be giving away all kinds of candy. Well, just as long as none of them are dressed up like squirrels.

8:24 AM. Parting ways with Spike. We assure each other that we will keep an eye out for any squirrels.

8:36 AM. Back home. Barking at the door. Human! It is I! Loki! The bane of all mailmen!

9:28 AM. Settling in for a nap by the fireplace. I could use one.

12:04 PM. Waking up. Hearing the rustling of things going on in the kitchen. I suspect it's lunchtime.

12:09 PM. Have successfully mooched a dinner roll from the human. Yum yum yum!

1:05 PM. The human asks if I want to go for a ride. Do I? Do tails wag?

1:29 PM. The human steps out of the car at a store. I hop right in the driver's seat

1:37 PM. Bark at a guy who passes right by the car. He jumps up, startled. Yes, well, there's a five foot clearance space on either side of this car that belongs to me, so unless you're getting into the car right next to this one, you're open to being barked at.

1:41 PM. The human is back in the car. Human, did you get me anything?

1:52 PM. Another stop. I get out with the human. I recognize this place... oh boy! It's the ice cream shop!

1:57 PM. The human's having cherry cheesecake ice cream cone. I'm devouring a strawberry ice cream cone. Human? Have I told you I love you?

2:36 PM. Back home. Wagging my tail. Any car ride is a good one. Well, not if one is going to the vet.

5:51 PM. Waking up to the smell of cooking. Smells like pumpkin.

6:03 PM. Having dinner with the human. She made pumpkin pancakes for dinner. Yum yum yum!!

7:45 PM. Trick or treaters have been coming and going. More to come, for sure. For some reason, one of them was dressed in a cat costume. Why couldn't she have worn a dog costume?

8:03 PM. Watching the human give away more of those candies to the trick or treaters. Just as long as she doesn't give away any dog biscuits, that's fine with me. The problem is how do I mooch any leftover candies?

9:35 PM. I take it the trick or treaters are done, human? We haven't heard the door for a half hour. So, are you going to be giving me the leftover candy?

11:48 PM. The human's off to bed. She did have leftover candy, but she's put it in the pantry, and curses, I can't open doors. Good night, human! If you get any Hallowe'en ghosts coming around tonight, I'll be right here downstairs, cowering under the couch.


  1. The bit about the ice cream cone made me think of my mom's dog. Mom went to Dairy Queen to pick up goodies for us one night, and her dog went along. Mom bought Schatzi an ice cream cone and had to drive home with one hand because she had to hold the other across the back of the seat so Schatzi could eat her ice cream. It was that, or that crazy dog would be trying to get in her lap!

  2. Okay, you know I love these dog ones. Too great.

  3. Perfect post for a Monday.
    Loki is wonderful just so funny, charming and full of life.
    No matter what he is happy.
    Unlike the depressed and disgusted cat next door rarely anything pleases him.

    Love the puff ball of doom and the backyard protector. Darling !
    cheers, parsnip

  4. See, that's why my cat was never allowed on the counters. I can see why the dog would think it was okay too.

  5. I don't know where you find all those delightful photos (or have the time to go looking for them).

    Bane of all mailmen is a superb bit of writing.

  6. @Norma: dogs will do that!

    @Whisk: thanks!

    @Parsnip: I think of her as more demanding than depressed and disgusted!

    @Kelly: cats will do it anyway!

    @Mari: it takes time to assemble these!

  7. The five feet clearance around the car made me laugh. So true! And heaven forbid anyone walk on the sidewalk out in front of my house while my dog is in the yard--that's her sidewalk!

  8. I'll take one of those Great Dane anti depressants!

  9. So cute, but YAY, more Bulldogs!

  10. The catsitter made me snort my drink! He's obviously an educated doggie!


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