Faith Can Move Mountains... But Dynamite Works Better

Saturday, August 30, 2014

A Day In The Life Of A Cat

Some links to see to before we get started on anything else. Norma had reflections on Robin Williams and on rental referrals. She also has a passage from Sam's Story. Parsnip had a Square Dog Friday yesterday. Shelly had a happy birthday for her brother. Lorelei wrote about her birthday. And Krisztina had a photo of the week.

Now then, time to turn my attention to the feline point of view...

7:30 AM. Awakening in bed. The staff is showering in the bathroom. How did she get out of bed without waking me?

7:32 AM. Heading downstairs. Turning on television. Weather Channel suggests thunderstorms moving through this area later in the day. Well, that's not good. It could be worse though. Just as long as I'm not outside while it's raining.

7:35 AM. Off goes the television. I find weather people to be tedious paranoid creatures at best. They seem to panic at the first sign of snow and suggest people start thinking of eating the dead.

7:45 AM. Well, staff, it's about time you showed up down here. Breakfast time, and let's make it snappy.

7:47 AM. The staff disappoints me by offering up field rations. I sigh with much dismay, and demand to be let outside.

8:30 AM. Sitting in the backyard, staring at the sky, pondering the meaning of cat toys. Do they serve any other purpose aside from something for me to destroy?

8:51 AM. Oh, great, it's that stupid annoying mutt from down the road passing by through my forest.

8:52 AM. The stupid mutt mentions something about Nixon going to China. What an idiot. It is a fundamental truth: all cats know that Nixon can't be trusted. The man was a dog person, after all.

8:53 AM. I hiss and yowl my displeasure with the presence of the dog. This time the idiot takes a hint and leaves. Stupid dog.

8:56 AM. I demand the staff let me back inside.

9:05 AM. After much internal debate, I decide to eat some of the field rations.

11:05 AM. Woken out of my nap by a thunderous roar. What was that????

11:06 AM. Looking outside. Lightning. Walls of rain. Thunder sounding all over the place.

I'm so glad I'm not outside right now.

11:15 AM. I find the staff looking out the kitchen windows. If I wasn't mistaken, I'd think she was enjoying this kind of weather.

The staff notices me and asks if I think that lightning is fun.

She is enjoying this. Humans are weird.

11:20 AM. A thunderclap that's louder than any I've heard already booms. Hey! Storm! How dare you interrupt my morning nap!

11:40 AM. Spending my time lying by the fireplace. Listening to the thunder. I bet that annoying mutt is cowering in his basement right about now.

12:15 PM. The storm continues. I wonder if we're going to lose power.

1:20 PM. Oh, come on already! That storm is denying me the quiet I need for my afternoon nap.

2:35 PM. Running out of ways to kill time waiting for the thunder to end. I've already gone through 99 Cans Of Tuna On The Wall twice.

5:55 PM. The thunderstorm finally seems to be at an end. Things are more quiet. 

I've been denied hours of naps, and believe me, I'm cranky about it.

6:10 PM. The staff is making dinner. Staff, I would prefer something very tasty. Something that can compensate for my utter lack of sleep all day.

6:40 PM. The staff and I settle down to dinner. She's made spaghetti and meatballs for herself. Meatballs for me, and a side of milk. Yes, this is sufficient compensation for that utter waste of a day waiting for a bit of quiet so I could nap. One thing's for sure, I'll sleep well tonight.

7:55 PM. The staff, for some reason, decides to watch a video. I debate going upstairs to sleep. 

Wait a minute, after a day with this much rain, you're watching that Noah movie?

8:45 PM. Staff, this movie is silly. Russell Crowe looks silly. Those rock creatures look silly.

9:30 PM. Furthermore, staff, what need was there in the world to put dogs on that Ark? I swear, staff, this is a cheesefest of stupidity! You and I need to have a serious discussion about your appalling taste in movies. 

11:05 PM. The staff is off to bed. I'll stay down here. I've been up too many hours. I need to sleep. Dream of chasing mice and finding the ultimate stash of catnip.


  1. A draw! Schrodinger's cat and *sings* "Don't stop retrieving".
    Jane x

  2. I'm with cat, anything with Russell Crowe in is frightfully bad taste :)

  3. Your cat has good taste in movies.

    And that gray cat talking about the black and white cat? My paranoid girl-cat is positive someone snapped that picture when the gray cat was dissing her. She's wanting your email addie to scream at you but don't worry; I won't give it to her.

  4. Hope cat finally got a good night's sleep so he can be well rested for all the napping he'll do the next day;)

  5. @Jane and Chris: thank you!

    @Grace: and here I haven't even seen Noah.

    @Jennifer: they are!

    @Cheryl: Oh, I wouldn't mind being screamed at by your cat!

    @Maria: naps for cats are essential!

  6. Loki turned Thor into

    Of course, I love anything with Grumpy Cat, so....

  7. I don't think Loki wants to tangle with a cat. ;)

  8. I do not know where find the photos, but they are amazing.

  9. Aren't all presidents dog-people. Hmmm...we haven't been able to trust any of them. Have we?

  10. Zombie Kitties !
    The only kitties worth having hahahhahahahaha

    cheers, parsnip

  11. @Norma: it's better than having Loki turn him into a frog!

    @Kelly: Loki can occasionally be foolish!

    @Mari: thank you!

    @Shelly: for the most part, they've all been dog people!

    @Parsnip: but kitties are the greatest form of life on the planet!

  12. My favorite was the snooze cute!

  13. OK William
    I have have told The Square Ones what you said.
    They were very quiet and that is always a very bad sign. So forget Putin, lighting strikes Micheal Bay or even a certain Mountie.
    I would be afraid very afraid.

    cheers, parsnip

  14. Cute. The kitten in the basket is adorable. One of my youngest son's roommates has a cat and he adores it. Are they really not afraid of storms? Arthur just shakes continually and won't let me out of his site if there is even a hint of a storm.

  15. HAHAHAHHA!! The gerbil on the cat is priceless!!

    Is that a gerbil or a long tailed hamster??


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