Faith Can Move Mountains... But Dynamite Works Better

Monday, May 12, 2014

A Day In The Life Of A Cat

Before we get started today, some links to see to. Yesterday was another Snippet Sunday, so Norma had a post from a book she'll be re-releasing as an ebook. At the joint blog, we had a Snippet Sunday post as well. Cheryl writes about squirrel problems at her blog. The Happy Whisk had a rather unusual image post at her blog.

Now then, as always, the cat's point of view is at hand. Check the last blog for where this one started if you haven't read it yet.


7:20 AM. Awake. Dreamed of balls of yarn everywhere. A very good dream. I wonder if I can project myself back into that dream during my next nap.


7:30 AM. The staff comes downstairs. Well, it's about time, staff. Why don't you make yourself useful and feed me some breakfast?


7:35 AM. The staff sets down a bowl of milk... and another bowl of tuna. I must admit, I'm surprised. She usually puts down field rations.

Okay, staff, what are you up to?


7:37 AM. Enjoying myself eating breakfast. I wonder if my many protests this time of day have finally made the staff see the light about field rations.

Or is it possible she just ran out of field rations and has to go shopping?


7:50 AM. The staff lets me out the door. It's time for my morning constitutional. 


7:55 AM. I can hear the barking of that idiot dog from down the road in the distance. Note to self: determine precisely what use dogs actually have, because whatever it is, it's not obvious.


8:05 AM. Musing on the profound questions in life. What is the meaning of the Red Dot? Do humans serve any purpose aside from serving cats? 


8:35 AM. Continuing my rounds. Finding myself thinking of the best position to sleep in when I get home. Assuming the staff hasn't left without my express opinion.


8:45 AM. I hear some strange splashing as I walk towards a meadow. I wonder what that is....


8:46 AM. I see the source of that noise. The idiot dog from down the road is rolling around in a gigantic mud puddle.


8:50 AM. Watching the dog. What an idiot, getting himself filthy like that. No one ever accused dogs of being smart, though.


8:55 AM. The stupid dog has just noticed me. Oh, wonderful. Just what I needed...


8:56 AM. Oh, it's even worse now. He's coming out of the mud. Can't he take a hint? I don't like dogs!


8:57 AM. The foul hound is wagging his tail. Oh, like I'd trust you for a second.


8:58 AM. I hiss in annoyance while determining the best route away from this mud encrusted mutt. 


8:59 AM. What part of leave me alone do you not get?


9:00 AM. Walking away from the irritating hound. I will never understand dogs.


9:25 AM. Back home. Hello, staff. I am pleased that you didn't leave without my permission. I saw that annoying mutt from down the road. He'll be in for a long bath when he gets home.


1:00 PM. Waking up from nap. It started out in a sun puddle, but the sun's moved off. Come on, that wasn't fair! I wanted to wake up in the sun puddle too!


2:40 PM. The staff is having tea. I leap up onto the table and stare at her.


2:45 PM. Conferring with the staff. Explaining quite ardently my theory that our understanding of the universe  can be explained if one first thinks of the universe as a big ball of string. She does not appear to be grasping the lesson.


2:50 PM. No luck in persuading the staff of my theories. Instead I have myself some tea and convince the staff to let me have one of those scones. I reward her with some purrs.


4:55 PM. Woke up from my second nap. I wonder if the staff is planning dinner yet.


5:40 PM. The staff is busy in the kitchen. I am watching one of those cable news channels. Honestly, does repeating the same half hour over and over again count as news?

And why aren't you people interviewing scientists who might have some explanation about the purpose of dogs? Inquiring minds want to know!


6:25 PM. The staff has been making pancakes for dinner. With bacon and blueberries. An odd combination, but still, it's pancakes. When do we eat, staff?


6:40 PM. The staff and I are having dinner. Pancakes taste delicious... and all the more so when I have bacon in the mix. Tell me, staff, when are you going to make this for breakfast? Not that I mind what you gave me for breakfast today. I still wonder if you were up to something...


11:55 PM. Waking up from a nap. The lights are out. Wait a minute... the staff went up to bed without my permission?

Oh well. I'll just have to go upstairs, jump on the bed, and dig my claws in a bit on the covers.


19 comments:

  1. Snow IS a four letter word!
    Jane x

    ReplyDelete
  2. I told you s*** is a four-letter word!

    And you cannot go wrong with Grumpy Cat!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Tuna for breakfast and no nasty surprises... that was a good day :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. @Kelly: strictly speaking, I'd say Jack Dawson's the one that needs to be pushed off the boat.

    @Jane and Chris: and such a beautiful four letter word!

    @Norma: Grumpy Cat is all wise!

    @Grace: well, aside from the face to face with a muddy dog...

    @Eve: thank you!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Grumpy cat always makes me laugh!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Push her!

    Bahahahahha!!

    I thought the same thing when I watched that part of the movie. :)

    ReplyDelete
  7. My cat thinks the cat in the fish tank is a hunk.

    She also thinks he's gonna catch some fish.

    ReplyDelete
  8. OMG! I really loved LSD cat and devil dog. So funny!

    Hugs and chocolate!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Grumpy Cat urging the man to push the woman overboard was funny! Yes, I do have a twisted mind.

    ReplyDelete
  10. @Deb: she's cute that way!

    @Diane: "I'm flying, Jack, I'm fly...agggghhh!"

    @Cheryl: it's all in the attitude.

    @Shelly: thanks!

    @Mari: so do I!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Considering it snowed here yesterday, I'm definitely thinking snow is a 4-letter word!

    ReplyDelete
  12. #1 push her, please push her and then jump yourself.

    cheers, parsnip

    ReplyDelete
  13. Being a cat owner/lover and the obedient servant of two cats, I enjoyed these photos and your commentary very much.

    I feel something clawing at my leg now, so I have to go. Catch you later. I hope.

    ReplyDelete
  14. That lifeguard makes me oh so glad I can swim!

    ReplyDelete
  15. This had me chuckling--and reading between editing book!
    Funny stuff, William!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Agreed, snow is a four letter word :D
    I'd love to know how they got that cat to play fetch too- surely it has dog in its DNA!

    ReplyDelete

Comments and opinions always welcome. If you're a spammer, your messages aren't going to last long here, even if they do make it past the spam filters. Keep it up with the spam, and I'll send Dick Cheney after you.