Faith Can Move Mountains... But Dynamite Works Better
Showing posts with label John Adams. Show all posts
Showing posts with label John Adams. Show all posts

Monday, July 3, 2017

The Star Spangled Mulligan Family Line


"Lousy Continental Congress. Keep me, the great Jebediah Mulligan, out of their meetings, will they? And just because I demanded to be named King and Emperor of whatever the hell comes next? Jethro! Fetch Papa his musket, boy!" ~ Jebediah Mulligan, December 1, 1775

"All right, Mr. Adams, Mr. Franklin... how about this? We hold these truths to be self evident, that all men are created equal, except for that no good dirty snake Jebediah Mulligan." ~ Thomas Jefferson, June 29th, 1776


"I'm such a humble person. Completely modest. Everyone says that about me. Everyone says, 'gosh, there goes that humble, modest John Hancock. Oh, and he's brilliant and handsome too. Why don't we just name him the Sun King right now and get it over with?' Someday when I'm long gone and well esteemed in the annals of history, people will say 'John Hancock was a great but humble man'. Hey, why aren't you all applauding?" ~ John Hancock, July 2nd, 1776


"Oh, Martha, I had the most peculiar dream. The Chief Executives of the country had their faces on American currency, and that currency was inserted into the g-strings of strippers dancing to strange music in dimly lit glittering places. And I don't even know what a g-string is! Oh, curse this era and its pantaloons and itchy underwear..." ~George Washington, September 10th, 1790

"It was quite an era, our esteemed Congress and the signing of our Declaration. We all knew it was a point of no return, and we all committed ourselves to it selflessly. Well, selflessly except for one, who committed himself to it selfishly. That's the only way I know how to describe that narcissistic blowhard Hancock. Giant sized signature, my Massachusetts hindquarters! A man with a signature like that is definitely over-compensating for something, if you ask me." ~ John Adams, March 12th, 1802


"Four score and seven hours ago, I undertook the enviable task of thrashing that conniving weasel and town drunkard Big Jim Mulligan in a fist fight. It will take him four score and seven months to get out of the body cast." ~ Abraham Lincoln, November 3rd, 1834

"Speak softly and carry a big stick. And use the stick to knock some sense into that no good Harry Mulligan." ~ Theodore Roosevelt, December 23rd, 1903

"We have nothing to fear but fear itself. We have plenty to shake our heads in dismay about though. Such as that  repugnant skunk Harry Mulligan still walking this earth and having children. Honestly, people, this family has been a thorn in the side to the American nation since day one." ~ Franklin Delano Roosevelt, March 27th, 1939


Happy Independence Day to my American readers!

As was the case with my Saturday post for Canada Day, it has been my habit in recent years to mark the Fourth of July with a post crossing the country from east to west through photos. Because there are fifty states (and one district), each year I divide the states, choosing spots in each in turn that seem of interest. Some I've seen, others I'd like to visit. And so here they are....

Haffenreffer Museum of Anthropology, Providence, Rhode Island


Bingham Falls, Vermont


Captain Nathan Hale Monument, Conventry, Connecticut


Whiteface Mountain, New York


Sandy Hook Lighthouse, New Jersey


Fort McHenry, Baltimore, Maryland


Seneca Caverns, West Virginia


Theodore Roosevelt Memorial, Washington, D.C.


Fort Sumter, South Carolina


Fort Donelson, Tennessee


BB King Museum and Delta Interpretive Center, Indianola, Mississippi


Hodges Gardens State Park, Louisiana


Onyx Cave, Arkansas


Perry's Victory & International Peace Memorial, Ohio


Limberlost State Historic Site, Geneva, Indiana


Cave Of The Mounds, Wisconsin


Eagle Mountain, Minnesota


Fort Dodge Museum, Iowa


Cimarron National Grassland, Kansas


Black Mesa, Oklahoma


Wheeler Peak, New Mexico


Sand Mountain, Nevada


Black Canyon of the Gunnison National Park, Colorado


Jewel Cave National Monument, South Dakota


Lower Mesa Falls, Idaho


Mount Hood, Oregon

Monday, July 4, 2016

John Adams, The Grumpiest President


"When you're born you get a ticket to the freak show. When you're born in America, you get a front row seat." ~ George Carlin

"All people are alike. Except Republicans and Democrats." ~ Groucho Marx


"John, I can safely predict that some two hundred and two score years from now, give or take a year, a snarky Canadian will be suggesting you have a cranky nature." ~ Benjamin Franklin, July 4th, 1775
"Rubbish, Franklin! Everyone knows I have a perfectly happy perso.... dammit, Hancock, what the hell did we tell you about signing the Declaration with a normal signature?" ~ John Adams, July 4th, 1775


Happy Fourth of July to my American readers! To mark the occasion, in recent years I've featured spots of interest, some of which I have visited myself, and others that are on the proverbial list. Each year I choose from half the states, and move onto the other half in the following year. Enjoy, and have a wonderful day.

Mount Katahdin, Baxster State Park, Maine
Adams National Historic Site, Massachusetts
Saint-Gaudens National Historic Site, New Hampshire
Flight 93 Memorial, Shanksville, Pennsylvania
Yorktown Battlefield, Virginia
Cape Henlopen State Park, Delaware
Mount Sterling, Great Smoky Mountains National Park, North Carolina
Castillo de San Marcos, St. Augustine, Florida
Andersonville National Historic Site, Georgia
Tuskegee Institute National Historic Site, Alabama
Abraham Lincoln Birthplace National Historic Site, Kentucky
Meramec Caverns, Missouri
Field Museum, Chicago, Illinois
Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore, Michigan
Museum of the High Plains, Nebraska
Fort Union National Historic Site, North Dakota
Glacier National Park, Montana
Devils Tower National Monument, Wyoming
Guadalupe National Park, Texas
Saguaro National Park, Arizona
Bryce Canyon National Park, Utah
Haleakala National Park, Hawaii
Joshua Tree National Park, California
Olympic National Park, Washington
Katmai National Park, Alaska