A Day In The Life Of A Dog

 It is time once again for the perspective of the dog and the cat. As is always the case, the dog gets the first say in these things, since he's so easily distracted by literally everything around him.

7:10 AM. Waking up at home. Big stretch and a yawn. Slept exceedingly well. Dreamed of chasing squirrels through the snow.

7:12 AM. A look outside. Okay, so we're dealing with a lot of snow on the ground. And as I recall from the weather forecast last night, more of it to come in the afternoon. Well, I don't mind that. Lots of opportunities to run and play in it. But first things first. Breakfast. Priorities, Loki, priorities.

7:16 AM. Waiting patiently on the human to do get downstairs and see to my breakfast.

7:20 AM. Thumping my tail as the human arrives downstairs. Good morning, human! Fine day, isn't it? Say, how about we get started on my breakfast? I don't know about you, but I'm starving. I haven't eaten in nine hours, you know...

7:23 AM. The human is pouring me a big bowl of kibbles. 

Oh boy oh boy oh boy oh boy....

7:24 AM. Licking my chops after polishing off breakfast just three seconds shot of the all time fastest finish.

7:28 AM. Making inquiries with the human as to if she'll let me out for my run.

7:30 AM. Out the door and on my way. See you later, human!

7:36 AM. Running through the back fields, barking my head off, as happy as I can be.

7:52 AM. Stopping in to see Spike the Magnificent, Tormentor of Squirrels. Hey, Spike!

7:53 AM. After customary doggie greetings, Spike and I get to talking about important matters. The cold weather. Potential opportunities to bark at the mailman. What the squirrels have planned.

8:01 AM. Spike and I talk about what the weather forecasters are calling Snowmageddon. Come on, it's just a snowstorm. This is Canada. These things happen. Spike, those people are silly. Maybe not as silly as that weather guy who kept saying we'll have to eat the dead, but last I heard, he was in an insane asylum.

8:10 AM. Parting ways with Spike. See you later!

8:31 AM. Passing through the woods, realizing that I'm near the property where that cranky cat lives. I think I'll stop by and say hello.

8:35 AM. Coming onto the property, sniffing about. Oh, wait... there she is at a window.

8:36 AM. The cat howls and hisses at me as if I'm the most unwelcome pest she's ever seen.

I don't understand cats.

8:50 AM. Coming back home. Human! It is I, Loki. Annoyer of Mailmen and Chewer of Slippers. Let me in!

8:52 AM. The human intercepts me with the Towel of Torment to dry me off before I can sneak inside. Human, I only rolled through four snow drifts.

12:35 PM. The human is having lunch. I mooch a ham and cheese sandwich off her.

6:23 PM. Dinner time. The human has made macaroni and meat, and has given me a plate. Boy, is this good!

6:48 PM. The human is doing dishes. I'd help, human, but really, I'd end up dropping dishes and making a mess of everything.

8:01 PM. The weather forecasters are using that word again. Snowmageddon. Stop exaggerating. It's only forty centimeters. On top of the ninety five centimeters we've already got on the ground.

11:37 PM. The human is off to bed. Well, good night, human. Sleep well. The snow will fall, and we might have to shovel ourselves out the front door in the morning. And by we, I mean you.