Behold, The Inept Spellcaster Spam

They will never take a hint and just stop. They will never decide to just go find an honest way to make a living. No, their default setting is to annoy the rest of the world with their tactics and techniques. I speak, of course, of the vile, reprehensible lot known as homo sapiens spammeritis irritatingus, otherwise known as internet scammers and spammers. They infest our blog comments with spam for crap we don't care about. They send random emails with a too good to be true proposal (because it's not true). The following came through as spam for my blog recently, the old reliable spellcaster spam.

Hello, I want to testify to the general public how my relationship was restored back by the great powers of Dr. Able after three months of loneliness, my ex-lover called me after my contact with Dr Able that he wants us to come back and start a good home, now we are happily married. All thanks to Dr. Able for his wonderful spiritual help. You can contact him for any relationship challenges or any solution you may need, Good Luck. 

That's actually shorter than the usual spellcaster spam comment. These usually go into great detail and personal agony about the cheating spouse and the endless nights of tears and despair. Not quite in this case. Short and to the point. But still, some of the usual signs of spellcaster spam telltales. Like "testify to the general public", which honestly, we don't care about, as this isn't a trial. Though the people sending this crap on behalf of the totally fake Doctor Able should be put on trial. The sentence structure that doesn't sound genuine.  And capitalizing words that don't need it. In short, pure spam. 

It might be my fault. I write posts about spellcaster spam, and I'm going to get spam responses to it. But that doesn't excuse these idiots from sending this crap. And that's what it is. Crap. And it should be treated as such.

Dear spammer, it's about this point where I suggest awful punishments and ways to die for you. It's not as if you contribute anything to society, and nobody's going to miss you.

I would suggest that what you deserve is to be buried alive.

Yeah, that's it. The sort of situation that has you screaming before you run out of air, and going out of your mind.