Faith Can Move Mountains... But Dynamite Works Better

Monday, August 8, 2011

Boxers, Briefs, Speedoes, And Going Commando


In the last few days, several of my blogging friends have been answering a certain challenge called the Under Where Challenge. This started over at Eves' blog The Desert Rocks, where she was answering the same kind of challenge from Laila Knight. The idea's simple: answer a series of questions about underwear, and see where it takes us. Already we've seen some blogs to answer this one, and others who are promising to do the same.

Mike Saxton
Christina Lucas
Donna Yates
Beth Muscat

These four bloggers, in addition to Eve, have already played along with the challenge. Among the rest of the gang of rogues and scoundrels I'm acquainted with who've been challenged are Norma, April, Mark, and Shelly. We're expecting answers, people!

Now, before the questions, I'll issue this challenge to a few extra bloggers to see what they can come up with, if they're willing to play along....

Scarlett and James  (rumor has it our alter egos will have lots of fun with this one)
Karla Telega
Erin Lausten
Don't Hate Hubby
Angry Parsnip
Talli Roland
PK Hrezo
The Happy Whisk

And without further ado... the questions.

1. What do you call your underwear/undergarments? Do you have any commonly used nicknames for them?

Boxers, of course, since that's what they are. I wouldn't give them nicknames, mind you. Sort of odd calling that pair over there "Nigel", or that pair "Lord Brutus Victorious" or that other pair "Dear God it's cold today, break out the flannels, you idiot!"

Ahem.

By the way, why do we call it a pair? It's one piece of fabric, damn it!

2. Have you ever had that supposedly common dream of being in a crowded place in only your underwear?

No, but I have had the occasional dream of being up on a rock face with only my climbing boots, the rope and harness, and my underwear on. Does that count?

3. What is the worst thing you can think of to make underwear out of?

Glass, of course... Poison Ivy would probably be worse. Yes, the poison ivy would be worse.

4. If you were a pair of panties, what colour would you be?

Psychedelic purple. The real question is... who would I be on?

5. Have you ever thrown your underwear at a rock star or other celebrity? If so, which one(s)? If not, which one(s) WOULD you throw your underwear at, given the opportunity?

Easy: Sarah McLachlan, who, of course, is a goddess. Though to be honest, I don't think she'd appreciate it. I could throw them at Courtney Love, who'd probably use it to distill some heroin.

6. You're out of clean underwear. What do you do?

In such circumstances, I must, naturally, go commando. I... probably shouldn't have said that, should I? Now everytime you hear me say I have laundry to do, you'll be wondering if the jeans or the shorts are the only stitch of clothing I've got on below the waist line. Answer: there's also the socks. Keep wondering.

7. Are you old enough to remember Underroos? If so, did you have any? Which ones?

What the bloody hell is an Underroo?

8. If you could have any message printed on your underwear, what would it be?

"If You're Reading These Words, We're Getting Lucky Tonight."

9. How many bloggers does it take to put panties on a goat?

Fifteen.

The real question is: how pissed off will that goat be if you're trying to slide panties onto it? And by extension, what fraternity are you a part of if they make you do that?


21 comments:

  1. Okay, you just took the glaring spotlight off Mike. He's probably grateful for that.

    Number 2 is scary!

    As for number 6, I've wondered about those times you've had to carry that backpack in front of you.

    And number 8: Very clever!

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  2. Oh, too funny. Good answers. Well done, William.

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  3. Playgirl magazine used to run an ad for boxers and briefs that read: HOME OF THE WHOPPER.

    That could get a lot of guys arrested for false advertising.

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  4. Um, I need a minute to sift through all of the inappropriate comments in my head...okay, well, I love Sara McLachlan, and I do believe we're the only ones in the bunch who don't know what underoos are.

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  5. wahahahahahahahahahah.....
    A lot of information that boggles the mind.

    cheers, parsnip

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  6. Hi William, I kept wondering as I read this if you posed for that photo on top and then I thought you stayed true to your tough image. Don't worry I didn't detect a trace of vulnerability. 15 goats, wow that's a lot!

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  7. Oh William...love the blog. I would never have thought you would ever go commando...but, I'm glad you're not the speedo type. Boxers definitely...oh, and I wonder if you have any sparkly pairs...LOL

    Oh, and I think they might be called "a pair" because you have two legs (???) Just a guess...

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  8. Leave it to you William to add in plenty of great pics. And yes, Poison Ivy would be quite bad to make underwear out of.

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  9. Clearly I need to go out and find some celebrity to throw my underwear at.

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  10. And he just remembered that we're supposed to pass it along, challenge our friends to do it, too!

    You're right, William...Scarlett and James are perfect for this!

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  11. I'm morbidly curious about what Scarlett and James have to say.

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  12. Okay I'm gonna play along in the comments here ...

    1. I'm pretty boring. I call it underwear. Only call them panties if I'm making a joke. Something about the word annoys me.

    2. Nope. Never dreamed about that.

    3. Prolly sandpaper or brillo.... poison ivy is a great answer too. Ewww!

    4. I'd be tie-dyed hipsters

    5.Nope, never tossed the undies. I'd never do that... it's ridiculous. If I was forced to throw them at some one it'd have to be someone really uptight like Cheney or Limbaugh.

    6. I'd rather go commando than wear dirty ones

    7. Oh how I <3 my underoos. I had WonderWoman and C3PO. Wish they made adult underoos... I'd so have a collection!

    8. Out to Lunch

    9. Last time we tried this it took 3 of us. ;)

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  13. OOo thelisas want to take the Under Where Challenge! Not sure why, considering we play it every day, but still...

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  14. Lisas: You're on my challenge list, so go for it!

    PK, you are an original!

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  15. William,
    Wowww! Lol. Love your answers, especially nmbrs 1, 2, 4, 6, 8, and 9. Although, nmbr 5 was cool, too (about Courtney Love).

    PK,
    Lol.

    Karla,
    I agree with you, there. I aso would love to see what Scarlett and James would have to say about this.

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  16. What the Amish community is doing spamming in a blog is somewhat beyond me....

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  17. I would love to take this challenge - perhaps I'll give it a go on Monday, if I remember. I'm rubbish at remembering things like this, but I do love panties.

    You have good taste. Sarah McLaughlin rocks!

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  18. Hm, sounds interesting. I might consider doing this.

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  19. @PK: good answers!

    @Talli: we look forward to it!

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Comments and opinions always welcome. If you're a spammer, your messages aren't going to last long here, even if they do make it past the spam filters. Keep it up with the spam, and I'll send Dick Cheney after you.